Buckfast Tonic Wine Will Kill More People in The UK Than Cigarettes

Buckfast TonicBuckfast Tonic Wine – made by monks and drunk by punks – is finally being popularized by attempts to ban it in Scotland. And it’s actually killing people.

Not in that slow way that cigarettes do. It would take about 500 cartons of cigarettes landing on your head in the space of about 10 seconds to kill you. Buckfast does it faster.

114 incidents of hate-crimes were reported in which the actual drinker brandished the bottle itself were reported in some nondescript timespan or other. I reckon a youth of today could probably neck a bottle in about 7 minutes if pushed, and after about another 8 minutes would have a system so full of syrup, monks and caffeinated booze, they’d be liable to attack someone with the empty bottle. So the effects are presumably easy to trace. Just lock up some chavs in a room, give half of them bottles of bftw and see which side wins. Two chavs enter, one chav leaves – that kind of thing.

1 thought on “Buckfast Tonic Wine Will Kill More People in The UK Than Cigarettes”

  1. Pingback: Hubble Bubble Gin and Trouble

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