I have nothing to do with the treatment of substance abuse at Passages, Malibu. But perhaps I’ll go there, and like a burglar picking up new tricks in the slammer, I’ll find out new substance abuse tricks. Lately, I’ve been tinkering with super strength cider. I like it. In about fifteen minutes you can be foaming at the mouth, wailing and gnashing, and giggling hysterically.
If I owned a cider factory, I’d add more anti-emetics though – as there’s only so many cans of the sweet and sickly syrup you can drink before you start gagging. The headlines would read, “Anti-vomit formula increases cider sales in the homeless population. Stock soars in depression.” Followed by: “Cider CEO implicated in 25 drink related fatalities on the streets of London. ‘The customer base could all be dead soon,’ says Morgan Stanley who downgrades its rating to sell.”
Rather than booze at a alcohol addiction centre, Chuck Palahniuk (Fight club bloke) decribes sex at a sex addict workshop in a very amusing way.
His description of brinkmanship is also an amusing look at leaving things until the last minute to imbue them with an additional sense of drama. I think that’s how I live my life; if something’s not exciting enough but quite important (moving house, finishing a piece of work for a new client, getting a mortgage), get intoxicated and then try it – it’ll be more fun.