If an ear-to-ear smiling tourist with fresh from the jumbo bleached white skin is to pass a fully locked-on bumster and dissuade them from prolonged nonsense-preaching they must simply follow the following rules:
- Never try to reason or use logical trains of thought in discussion with a bumster – reason never prevails as much as repetition in a low tone
- String together random sorties of words. To keep it refreshing, try to move between noun, verb and adjective at a good pace
- Smile goggle-eyed at them and blow raspberries at them
- Tell them that your old banana (European bachelorette on the make with an African partner) has run off with your strawberry (Your hunky studmuffin ginger haired demi-god)