Think of Texas and if the first thing that springs to mind isn’t Waco, George Bushes, Larry Hagman, Oil, Dell or steak, you’re probably thinking of cowboys. It has taken me over three weeks in Texas to become a cowboy. Today I became a cable wrangler. One of my duties was to follow the camera crew who rode on a giant skateboard along a flattened rollercoaster track. I would hold the camera cables in a loop in one hand like a cowboy. My task was to try to ensnare any passing cows in the loop and wrestle them to the ground before they escaped from aisle two of the Kwicky-mart we were shooting in.
In the event that there weren’t any cows, which there weren’t, I had to avoid getting any of the cast and crew stuck in the cables. Quite why they need a person for this is beyond me. Oh, that’s right, it’s because production assistants are unpaid, whereas a piece of sticky tape would cost something. And buying a wireless camera would be too efficient. When I make my first film, things are going to be different, I can tell you.