Hot Diggity

If you’re ever considering using your friend’s juicer to concoct colourful and unique cocktails while providing a good source of vitamins and minerals for you both, then take heed.

Orange, apple, ginger, melon – all good with vodka.

Carrot and vodka – passable if combined with preceeding fruit.

Celery and vodka – disgusting but mildly amusing.

Even when disguised with other fruit and veg, celery is not best taken with vodka. This combination has the double kick of the calmly sadistic marshall artist. It hammers you twice, and leaves a distinctly unejoyable sension in the mouth and throat.

Too much experimenting in too little time caused me to black out and fall asleep on a sofa with the comforting cushions lying redundant on the floor. We never got onto liquidised hot dog sausage and vodka, and I’ve since had to flee the scene. If anyone has any positive experience with liquidised meat and alcohol concoctions, please let me know.

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