“Papa Lazarou.”, they say, “Where have you been the last week or two – we haven’t heard much. Aer you chained to the bed of some brothel?”

Now, unusually for me, I haven’t been on the lookout for new wives. I have just been on some pisspot island beach, with very little internet access. And Railay Beach is the first place I’ve been to in Thailand where wives haven’t been throwing themselves at me in bars. And there are caucasian men with caucasian women. Laters Dave.